David
Gunn [composer, writer, isosogist]
Postcard parables
are short stories
that, for nearly a decade, I’ve
written on the backs of postcard-size images and
mailed to a person
who I know only as Queen
Quantoo. Thanks to a
really
teeny typewriter, I’ve managed to squeeze up to 450 words of
crucial
exposition onto a single card. New stories added every so often!
Acme Tent | Collectomometer | King Bob | Open Range | Torobongo |
Agent Jetglas | Convertin | Lake Portage | Ozzie and
Tanya | Trigger, Part 1 |
At Carnegie | Dear Patty (1) | Leaf Peepers | Phyllis’
Transformation | Trigger, Part 2 |
Atomic
Robot Corp. | Dear Patty (2) | Loch Ness | Pied du
Gorille | Trigger, Part 3 |
Baby Quantoo | Doris’
Piano | Lois | Pie R Squared | Tuna P.
Wiggle |
Balloonman | Dr. Beezer | Longsnouts | Pringler Hat | Ulnuf |
Bat Mann | Eat At ... | Louie Louie | Professor
Smacko | What You Want |
Bicycle Queen | Eating Right | Lulu | Queen Quantoo | Willie Sutton |
Big Gingham | Esther’s
Inheritance | Marge | Red Team | Wobblies |
Black Bart | Farmer Brown | Mascaraman | RMS Olympic | Yarngirl |
Blanche’s
Bad Dream | First Aid | McGillicuddy
Sisters | Sedoña
Cactus | Zontamk,
Part 1 |
Bonnie
and Clyde | Flora
and Flossie | Merle’s
Headache | Sheila | Zontamk,
Part 2 |
Boondock | Fred | Mick Rat | Sour Grapes | Zontamk,
Part 3 |
Collette’s
Big Hat | What’s
Behind Rags? | The Power of
Suggestion | Size Matters | In the
Kitchen at Midnight |
Boys in the
Band | From Ventnor | Milt | Stepford Plan | The
Decapitamometer |
Brad’s
Bad Day | Gerard | MoleTown | The Fence | The Pringler
Call Center |
Bud Bottoms | Gert Jonnys | Moon Mullet | The
Hairdresser | Starbucks |
Buddy | First
Contact 1
| Mr. Garibaldi | The Whale | Armed and Dangerous |
Bunnysaurs | I’m
Melting | Mr. Television | The Zenith | The Bubble Dome |
Bunyip
Bedpans | Jacques
Spratt | Ninjas | Tidybowlman | Never-U-Fail |
Cementland | Jim Bango | Oh, Noh! | Tony the Toe | Casa Shirley
|
Benö
Guttman | Pedro Piper | The
Preventilator | The Pringler
Chimneysweeper | The Double A’s |
That
Lightheaded Feeling | Or Best Offer | Clobber and Fungie | Aquerulous | Triomegunberg |
Olé | The Slug | At the
Banketbakkerij | The Braincage | The
McGillicuddy Backstory |
Is that a Gun in
your Pocket? | The Great Malaxo | Big Ed | Schwinndjammer | Sunhats |
Bésame
Mucho | Queen
Quantoo’s Change of Life | The MMRL | Gretchen’s
Songbirds | La maison du nez |
The Hypnagogue | Dora the
Demolition Dancer | How Many Fingers? | For better or
for worse | Julie
and L’étrange |
Caveat Emptor
| Fidough and
RoveR | Aqua Nun | The Dog
Whisperer | What Knot? |
Fred and
Freda | The Soothsayer | The Apple
Pickers | Florsheim | Wrongheadedness |
The Kyphosis Cure | The
Ventriloquist | The
Somnambulist | Identical Twins | Funny Money |
The Dish and the
Spoon | The Fly | The Perm | Calamity at the
Debutante Ball | What Lemuel Hath
Wrought |
Missfallen Sie
nicht Ilse! | The Third
Corollary | Convert-a-Gender™ | Jarabe
Tapatío | The Windows of
Luigi Peccadillo |
Nora | Acme Adult
Diaper Co. | Personal
Secretary | Meptang, Merchant
of Chains | Jumbo’s
Blind Date |
Forkman | Robin’s
Eggs | The
Acupressurer | Eye of the Hurricane | Captane
Jujjoo |
Nettie and
Betty | Edna Sue and the
DNCR | How Big? | Pothead | No
Complainer, He! |
The Drac-u-Latte | The
Perfect Likeness | The Iceman Cometh | Lola
Palooza Airways | Nutri-Clyster |
Next
Available | The Woxes | Duck and
Cover | The Rockettes | Clear
Enunciation |
High Society | The
Transferatron | Silver Queen | Cloak and
Dagger | Acme
Dance Partner |
The
Vasectomizer | Laksheesh | Spoonful of Honey | The
Liposuctionizer | Dr.
Pincatcher’s Legacy |
The Class
Project | The Dowser | Collateral
Damage | The Manicure | The First Step |
Jaws | Jeeves | Queen of
the Night | King
Sullivan’s Mine | The Brand
in Demand™ |
World’s Funniest Joke | Ding! | Skeeters | Flingspearing | Out-of-Body |
The
Expandomometer | At Chez Kibble | Dalton versus
Brutus | Secret Shriner
Handshake | Esther |
Fluffy | Across
the Steppes | Julie Jupiter | An
Embarrassing Moment | World’s Greatest Wiper |
Goo Goo G’joob | The
Daring Dinklakers | The Zaparo Brothers | Multitasking | Les Flambeaux |
Alfred
Eisenstatic
| The
Hyper-eyeballometer | The Mobile
Phone
| A Fish Story | Head in a Tuba |
The Carney | The Flamboni Way | Kitchen Magician | The Venus Flydress | Boxing Day |
The Preakness,
1956 | Pickleberry Jam | You Are Getting ...
Sleeeepy | The Everly
Brothers | Early Gort
|
The Boy Who
Walked on Water | Whither the
Crumbsnatcher? | Lot’s Lot | Point and
Shoot | Toast |
Forrest amongst
the Trees | Transformer | The Model 5 | Amazing Amelia | Ringaround |
S+R÷T=VG | Carspotting | The First PDA | Tweet! | Newton’s
Third Law |
Group of Ten | Chester and Nikita | Minnie and Mickey
I | Minnie and Mickey
II | The Foot Warmer |
Contretemps | Floaters | Merit Badges | The Best Things | In the Eye of ... |
The Onset | The Poundometer | Empirical Data | The Pipe
Cleaner | Crabby Old Lady |
Le Big Boy | l’Ecran
Magique | Ant Farm Weekend | The Pen | The Dirty Bird |
Madame Zaborga | Eternal
Masculinity | Electric
Shoes | Advantage:
Acrocephaly | Tripudio Oculus |
Ketchum | The EQs | Sweet Revenge | A Conchous Decision | The Yukonians |
All Sales
Final | Cuticulum
Enlargibilis | Cow Vows | Acute Vasomotor
Flush | Fat Man |
Proceed To Fire! | I ♥
What?! | Bobby | Leave it to Cleaver | Die Falschen
Nasen |
Be Careful ... | Dial-A-Hypnotist | On the Road | Which Came First? | Lawn Darts
circa
1966 |
Free Kick | Little Audrey | Catch It If You
Can | Drink
Dinklaker Tea | Suitcase Living |
Exceedingly
Hand-some | Sentience Sentry | Eighth and
Sycamore | Waiting for
You-Know-Who | The Clockhat |
Myrna | The Swan Maiden | Pinocchio: The
Later Years | The Man of
1,000 Faces | Tuesday Welder |
The Multitasker | Buffaloland | Smack in the Zaknob | On the Steps | Mickey Mouse Mob |
Acme Turbo Bath | Gen.
Tso’s Chicken | Prelude to
Guernica | World’s
Biggest Sneeze | The Krocwich |
Cankles | Fred and
Ginger 1 | Fred and
Ginger 2 | Ups and Downs | At the
Borborygmus Ball |
Taxi-dermy | Point,
Shoot, and Cheer | First
Contact
2 | Sheeplady | The Acme Hairnet |
Brad’s
Barbecues | The Blemtaur | First
Contact 3 | Canadian
Brass | Jack + Jill |
Rudolph | The
Kitchen Magician | First
Contact 4 | The Jungle
Cruise | The Model 2 |
An Unethical
Experiment | Doctors Without
Internes | Eeeeeee! | Batman | The
Model 3 |
Ethel and the
Merman | The New Hire | Le crachoir
électrique | At the Car Wash
Institute | From Humble
Beginnings |
Sumo-Cat | DECC | Blame it on Lola | Girl in the Moon | Ferrante
and Teicher |
El Sapo Gordo | In a
Foreign Nasal Corridor | The Fall of
London Bridge | Veni, Vidi,
Vici | Birth of the
Lightsaber |
One Two, One Two | The Breema
Manipulation | Babyface | The Master
Camouflager | The Avid
Fisherman |
Acme Pencil
Sharpening Co. | The Divine Joe
Lewis | Obliterato vs.
Audrey | Launch of the
Cruise Missiles | You Get What You
Pay For |
There was an old
woman ... | Bongo Fever | The Footwear
Filcher | The White Mud of
Minsk | Le Lapin Puissant |
Invisibaton | Baker’s
Man | Statues
Ain’t So Smart | More
Collateral Damage | The Scapegoat |
Godzilla:
The Early Years | Lemon Queen | The Higgs Boson | Earl the Hurl | When Hamsters
Conquered the Earth |
No Pain, No Gain | Jerome’s
Driving Test | The Brisman | Bring It On! | Homo Squirrelli |
1500 p.s.i. | Travel Restrictions | When GPS Units Go Bad | What Bob Felt | The
Stretch-o-Matic |
The Distraction | The Once Promising
Spook | How to Serve
Pancakes | The Brothers
Hasenpfeffer | The Gagman |
The American
Way | Monstrosis | The Chain
Smoker | Form Follows
Function | A.k.a. Robert
Zimmerman |
Bait | Heart Surgery | El Brazo Recto | The
Dinklaker Effect | The Diorama |
Right vs. Wrong | The Donor | The
Aesthetician | The
Crocodilogist | Shuffleboard:
The Beginning |
The Bat-chyderm | Mel and
Sheeba | Eva’s
Housecleaning Service | Der Yodel-Off | Gladys
Ginormous |
The DDDDetector | The Number 6 | The
Proto-Airstream | Wind Noise | The Shoeshine |
At the Hair
Stylist | The Carpus-Bearing
Clock | Enid | When worms fell
from the sky | At
Santa’s Laboratory |
Gobsmacked | A Barrel of Laffs | Mrs. Godzilla | The Best
Barber in the World | Bernard |
The Hair Salon
and Body Spa | The Original
Odd Couple | Yucca Flat | The
Tambourinistas | Je ne sais quoi |
Dapper Dan | Bird | The Knitter | Joyce,
Jeannette, and Monica | The Lamprey
Liberation League |
The Merry Men | Hypocrisy | Grapefruit
Queen | Yin and Yang | The Broomers |
Norman | The New Food
Court | Distracted
Driving | Oops | Whence the Red
Nose? |
Cousin Enid | The Moltaphant | That
Fateful Saturday | Pie in the Sky | Parallel
Parking |
The
Testimonials | The Takeover | Do the
Hokey-Pokey | Ol’
Squinty | Attention to Detail |
The Dinky Dinklaker | The Dinkbots | Mother Goose | Jack and Jill
IV | Wynken Blynken, and
Nadine |
Dewey’s
Discombobulation | Car No. 13 | Saving Space | Disneyland: The
Beginning | Blue Bonnet |
Help, Help! | The Chairman | Albuminoid
Pingo Dingback | The
Oculoplastic Surgeon | Earn Big Money! |
Huitzilopochtli | Flossing | Vikki and the Viksens | The
Grindstone | Zap Trap |
Paris
Electrique | That Savory
Glaze | Bigfoot | Rigor Crus | Coyotepuncture |
Heimlich’s
Maneuver | Clean Sweep | When
Cheerleaders Fell from the Sky | The Angels | Another
Chance |
Wartgirl | 6' 10½"? | Double Action | Klukkendanz | Extemporaneous
Urban Forager |
Larry + Enid | Lilliputitis | Best Friends | Champion
Cartwheeler | The
Once Consummate Waitress |
Drip Dry | The Edicycle | Yet Another
Chance | The Mark IV | Shark Deterrent |
The Chaperone | Earl
Smorgasbord | Worse Than Hives | Rule 15 | The Beulah |
The Long Rue | Binky | Molto Diablo | Approach, Flight,
Entry | Little Eva |
Faithful Fido | Welcome Wagon | Tongularum Conelli | Rematch! | The Oft Fickle
World |
Bob | The Penguin
Spellbinder | Suture Self | The A-6 | Truth in Advertising |
Flying | Flying School | Where is
Billy? | Sixty Rubles | Beware ... |
The Record | The Conductor | The Evolution of
Invention | Deidre | Tango Nuevo |
De Rit in de Kist | Room 81 | Joey Jetliner | Making Do | The Great Malaxo
Returns |
Konfetti Gesellschaft
Wiesbaden | The Medusa Effect | The Great Malaxo 3 | Et Tu, Rahway? | Scale of
Stinky Fish |
Caveat
Emptor Redux | Go Excelsior! | Get Down | The Bosco
Brothers | Quakeskis |
The Kansas Grand
Prix | The Judge | Hey, Look! | Snakes | Collateral
Damage II |
Dig It! | Le Tour | Using His
Head | Who Knew?! | Eunice |
Skullp | Jerome P. Tabla | Willie, the Flying
Whale | Incognito | Arthur P.
Toscanini |
The Blackburns | Bartholomew P. Wolf | Fred +
Ginger III | The
Wormhunters | Attila’s
Gastronomic Legacy |
Fury | Before the
Seatbelt | Dances With
Goats | Potquid Nam
Truffglog | Xotquid |
OOO to the Rescue | A Footnote | The X Note | Abuse | Bye-bye, Brad |
Trumpetitis | Freefall | The
Multi-ductor | Don’t
Drink ’n Drive | The
Sunken Cathedral |
Sabre Dance | The
Conduct-o-matic | 68 in; 67 out | Practice,
Practice, Practice | Mr. Jakkboxx |
Fedge | The Dog-a-pult | Shingle
Shortage Consequences | Buffalo Bill | Psoriasis
Pringlerellum |
Shoes
and Handbags | Madge and Badger | Hyperflexion | Waffle Music | Specialization |
Sinfonia
Artarctica | The Octet, First
Try | The Octet, Second
Try | Deluxe Dipilator | The Unlobster |
Ratatouille | The KB Mark IV | Brains! | Better Sans
Baton | Mastering the
Pentagram |
Bermuda
Triangles | The
Rhinotillexisicist | La Mer: The Real
Story | The Remedy | The Real
Miss Muffet |
The Beetles | I Can Fly! | Fried | The
Drumstick’s Story | The Squashed |
Some Damn Panda | The
Eyeballotomy | NIMBY | Mtumba | Staying Upright |
The Typewriter | Bark vs. Bite | The
Original Night Visitors | The
Hypermegahorn | D.S.I.S. |
Fudge | The
Acousticians | Pringwarm
Dinklaswami | Overengineered? | That Pesky
Third Law |
The
Macaquekaze | Don’t
Mess with Mükremim | Santa Out of
Season | Big Ken | Cecile |
The Pajama Courier | The
Blade-O-Buick | Swan Lake | The Suppositor | Good
Intentions |
Dolly Llama | Zelicious and
Zavory | Guptil | I Piccioni | Gadzook |
The Busboy | On Thursdays | A Hard Fiscal
Choice | Shinnnns! | Violintusoribus |
Engaged! | The Tip | The Untimely
Sprain | Lorna and Leo | Kolme Sokea
Hiiri |
Peepzilla | Voicemail’s
Original Voice | The Young Jack
Ripper | The Nunerizer | Stielhandgranaten |
The
Shadowgraphers | The Appleseeder | Bad Karma | Trumpetor
Jumbolorum | Miss
Lightbulb |
Mugplog to the
Rescue | The Best of
Times ... | The
Fightin’ Narwhals | Black Tie and
Tails | Frankencollie |
The
Deprogrammee | Graveyard of
the Chairs | Stan, the
Steelpan Man | Lonken-tom
Syndroom | Alfredo’s
Head |
The
Marshmallow King | Brain Food | Whistler
Sisters | Advantage:
House | Oh, those
Fingertips! |
The M-Phone | When Roads
were for Sheep | This Is/Was Your
Life | Radio
Activity | Factory Fresh |
Judo Menudo | Read the Fine
Print! | The Delinquent
Miners | In
Yeghegnadzor | The Bends |
Uncured Like Ham | Valet Parking | Meet The
Composer | The
Flatusophonist | The
Bartered Bride |
A Relative
Term | The DIY RPG | Perfect
Timing | A Million
Bucks | Bowser. And Meptang. |
Where’s
Dobbin? | The Rule
Breakers | The
Trouser Testers | That Anosmia Edge | Mesocyclone in
C Minor |
Jascha’s
Revenge | The
Flying Frenchman | Big Denny | Isabelle
Unconvinced | The Clamorphone |
The Swan of Jim
Bob Tuonela | The Allergy | Attacca! | The Bat Girls | Zarpox |
Inflation
Services | The Audition | The Rats in
the Walls | Enrico Robinson
Caruso | Stop the
Music |
Spicy! | Overcoming
Shortcomings | Amaurosis
stupidulum | Poor Angus! | Andrea Segovia |
The Nova | Live
and Learn | Pagliacci
Male | The Warning | Grotta
Alitosi |
Market
Research | The Elk Tamer | 32 ft/s² | Bobnak | The Shout Out |
Viva DCA | The Cause of
Trismus Revealed | The Handicap | 100
Headphones | The Typo |
Where’s
Hamish? | The Mark VI | No-U-Steer® | Head on a
Stick | Funa-zushi |
Willard | Pringler Quality
Hat Racks | The Illumbaton | Old Habits Die
Hard | Those
Extra Nutrients |
Fred +
Ginger IV | Trio Ausonia | Don’t
pooh-pooh the juju | Aunt Meptang | The Birdbath |
The Ethnic
Cleaner | Fredcrow | Incident in Row W | Neoplasms
Down | Lulubelle’s Remarkable Talent |
Only Yu | The Shiftbogger | Show and Tell Day | Yvonne | When Not to Salivate |
After a Hard Day | The Likeness | Before Socky | At the Big Red Tie | Sticking It Out |
Beulah Pavarotti | Pumpkin | The Riesenklavier | The Mighty Meptangs | Shuffle-Off |
Notes from the Journal | Way Out | How to Ding | The Human Piñata | The Human Loudspeaker |
Pringlerville Gardens | Escape from Alcatraz | Kronos: The Early Years | Can You Catch It?! | Valkyrie Sky Ride |
Nexus | Two Measures Early | With Passion | The MacArthur Fellow | If a tree falls ... |
Perchance to Dream | The Gibichungs | The Witness Tamperer | Shake it All About | Dinklaker Quality Instruments |
In from the Cold | Guess Who ... | The Mute | Ursine Valet Parking | The Big Bass Drum |
The Berlioz Belles | The Nose | Cricket(s) | Leggierissimo | Not 57 Minutes |
Emil | Regret | Inside the Box | First Man on Mercury | 9 + 6 |
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